BP’s Tony Hayward: ‘I’d like my life back’

British Petroleum CEO Tony Hayward apologized to the Gulf Coast residents on Sunday for the devastating oil spill. Hayward personalized the message by mentioning how the spill is taking a toll on his life, too.

Give the man a break!  He can’t help it!  He’s British!  Just kidnap him and play him the the song about and Andrew Jackson and the Battle of 1812 and the Mighty Missippi…

You know “in 1814 we took a little trip and fought the battle of New Orleans near the Mighty Mississippi”  or something like that…Over and Over again…while he’s wiping oil of of a pelican and one of yours kids crying, “Daddy, Are we gettin’ to stay here this year?”

I always liked Andrew Jackson, since he was Scots-Irish.  Seems the British got another battle going at the base of the Mississippi River again, huh?  Darn…

Just needed to call the Scots-Irish and we would have taken care of for ya…let us know when ya need some help…Either politically, militarily, or cleanin’ up an oil spill…

Just bring our boys home from Afghanistan, put them on the border, the balance put to work cleanin’ up…got the problem solved…

And good ole Tony can have flamin’ live back

…in fact, one of us will even fly him back to Britain…

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